How to create unstoppable inner confidence!

Confidence is not something you either have or don't have. One of the biggest myths about confidence is that it is a fixed trait that you are born with or without. This is not true. Confidence is a skill that can be learned, developed, and improved over time.

Throughout your lifetime it’s completely natural for our confidence levels to rise and fall; as you learn new things, become competent and gain enriching experiences your confidence grows as a result. The challenge is often regaining confidence after being hit by a challenge or big life change. Cultivating confidence is a process and is comprised of 4 key factors, connection, compassion, curiosity and courage. If you find yourself lacking confidence and want to rebuild it, this blog is for you.

“She believed she could so she did!”

Step 1. Cultivating Connection

Confidence starts from within you. Connecting to your why, intention, mission or purpose has the power to ground and anchor you into your inner knowing. Getting clear on why you want to do something, specifically how it will make you feel is the foundation to creating meaningful motivation.

Practicing this daily has the power to ignite and drive your energy to take inspired, authentic action - as you begin to feel more and more excited about bringing your ideas into reality! Another part of connection is making sure that you are pouring from a full cup of energy, by choosing to do things that nourish you, from physical movement, spending time with supportive and inspiring people to connecting with nature.

4 Ways to create & cultivate a feeling of Connection

1.Connect to your compelling purpose, mission & vision Getting clear on what is important to you & why you're choosing to spend your precious energy doing it, holds the powerful potential to naturally connect you to a sense of deep inner confidence. Tapping back into your vision, mission or purpose daily is energy-giving, helping you focus on the true meaning & therefore sense of fulfillment, creating more motivation & flow. Practice revisting your mission or vision everyday has the power to ignite and drive your energy to keep taking inspired, authentic action - as you begin to feel more and more excited about bringing your ideas to life!

2. Connect to your body We are energetic beings - literally made of trillions of tiny cells all vibrating at different frequencies. This energy is designed to move through you. When we take the time to connect our mind, body & soul in movement we connect all 3 in unity. It has the power to turn off our mind-chatter & turns our focus into the joy of movement. Trapped energy causes us dis-ease. Find ways you love to move & connect in.

3. Connect to your higher self Create spaces in your life to connect to yourself & your inner world regularly. In that space, underneath all of the busy thoughts, demands & expectations is a deep inner peace that is always within you. To experience this, is a practice, a habit that you prioritize & practice over & over again. Whether sitting in meditation or doing something where you are fully present in the moment, not in the past or the future, caught up in your mind's storytelling.

4. Connect to nature Everything is energy. Everything in nature is made of energy, as are you. When you take time to be surrounded by nature your mind, body & soul connects - creating a sense of grounded calm, because this is our nature; who we actually are at our core. Our lives have become so busy, we have lost touch with our nature; our nature of being over doing. Getting sunlight, fresh air & moving your body is some of the best ways you connect with your nature of peace.

Step 2. Cultivating Compassion

Showing yourself compassion is recognising how you're feeling about starting something new or stepping out of your comfort zone into your growth zone! Acknowledging and validating your nerves and fears - as it's totally understandable to feel this way! You're not a machine, you're human! How we speak to ourselves is a pivotal part of creating natural, grounded self confidence! Unfortunately we seem to have been taught to use tough love and beat ourselves up for being anything other than confident! Be your own kind and encouraging cheerleader!

4 Ways to create & cultivate a feeling of Compassion

1.Speak to yourself with compassion. Words carry the power to evoke emotions, convey thoughts, and create connections. The energy behind words can range from positive and uplifting to negative and draining. Choosing our words carefully can greatly influence how we communicate and interact with others, as well as how we perceive ourselves and the world around us. When we speak to ourselves with kindness and positivity, we create a nurturing and empowering inner dialogue. This can have a significant impact on our self-esteem, mental well-being, and overall outlook on life.

2. Imagine pouring loving kindness into every cell. Visualise pouring loving kindness into every cell of your being is a beautiful and powerful meditation practice. Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and let your imagination guide you: As you breathe in, imagine a warm, radiant light entering your body. This light is pure love, compassion, and kindness. Feel it gently flowing through your body, starting from the top of your head to the tip of your toes. This practice helps us move beyond the thinking, critical mind and shift our attention into your body.

3. Replace harsh judgment with loving kindness. When you notice a harsh or judgmental thought arising, pause for a moment. Take a deep breath and acknowledge that this is an opportunity for change. You have the power to choose another thought, one which is kind, supportive and uplifting. Remember that this is a process, and it's okay if you slip into self-judgment from time to time. Be patient with yourself and continue to cultivate a mindset of loving kindness. Over time, this practice will become more natural and deeply ingrained in your way of thinking and being.

4. Give yourself a compassionate hug. Hugs are not only emotionally comforting, but they also have fascinating physiological and psychological effects. From releasing the “love hormone” Oxytocin, improving heart health by lowering blood pressure, to reducing stress by decreasing the production of “stress hormone” Cortisol. Overall, the science behind hugs highlights their profound impact on both physical and emotional well-being. Whether with friends, family, or partners, sharing hugs can contribute to a healthier and more fulfilling life.

Step 3. Cultivating Curiosity

I count curiosity as a superpower we can all learn how to tap into more. Being curious is to be open minded - channelling your natural childlike energy, filled with excitement and anticipation of all the possibilities lying ahead of you! This is a superpower to cultivate! Think about how it feels in your body to be truly open and curious? Ask yourself what is the absolute best thing that could happen? Start from that place and work backwards... what are the thoughts you'd be thinking, how would that make you feel and what action might you take? And watch your energy rise and your confidence begin to bubble up from within you.

4 Ways to create & cultivate a feeling of Curiosity

1.Look for opportunities everywhere. Adopting a possibility mindset involves shifting your perspective to focus on opportunities, growth, and positive outcomes rather than limitations or obstacles. Be open-minded and receptive to new ideas, even if they initially seem challenging or unconventional. Approach situations with a willingness to explore different perspectives.

2. Open your mind & use your imagination. The power of imagination is truly remarkable. It's a cognitive ability that allows us to create, visualize, and explore ideas, concepts, and scenarios that exist beyond our immediate reality. Imagination inspires individuals to push boundaries, challenge norms, and envision a better world. It motivates us to strive for positive change and contribute to society. Imagination knows no bounds and is a fundamental aspect of human consciousness. By harnessing the power of imagination, we tap into a wellspring of creativity, inspiration, and potential that can enrich our lives and shape the world around us.

3. Be playful. Play is not just for children; it holds significant importance for adults as well. Engaging in playfulness and recreational activities can cultivate your natural curiosity, relieve stress, increase creativity, improve cognitive function and boost productivity. Incorporating play into may involve playing board games, creative hobbies, sports, outdoor adventures, or simply finding joy in spontaneous moments of fun. Embracing playfulness allows you to maintain a balanced and fulfilling life, promoting holistic well-being and a positive outlook on life.

4. Ask lots of open questions. The power of asking questions cannot be understated. Whether you're seeking information, engaging in meaningful conversations, or exploring your own thoughts, the power of asking questions is a tool that can enrich your personal and professional life. It encourages curiosity, growth, and a deeper understanding of the world around you.

Step 3. Cultivating Courage

Cultivating courage is a transformative journey that involves facing your fears, taking risks, and embracing vulnerability. Renowned Professor, Researcher & Writer, Brené Brown says “There is no courage without vulnerability. Vulnerability is not weakness. It's the ability to show up and be seen. It's the ability to be brave when you cannot control the outcome. When you show up in this way, you open yourself up joy and connection. Cultivating courage is an ongoing practice that requires dedication and a willingness to push your boundaries. Each courageous step you take, no matter how small, contributes to your personal growth and empowerment. Remember, the more you exercise your courage, the stronger it becomes, and the more you'll be able to embrace life's challenges with confidence.

4 Ways to create & cultivate a feeling of Courage

1.Take inspired action involves acting on your inner motivation, passion, and intuition to bring your ideas and aspirations to life. By identifying what truly inspires you, reflecting on your values, passions, and interests you can begin to pinpoint the source of your motivation. You can use this as fuel to take inspired action to move in the driection of your dreams.

2. Take one step at a time. Breaking down complex tasks or goals into smaller steps makes them feel more manageable and less overwhelming. It allows you to focus on each step without feeling daunted by the entire process. Great accomplishments are often the result of consistent and dedicated efforts, with each small step contributing to the overall achievement. Whether in personal projects, professional endeavors, or personal growth, embracing the principle of taking one step at a time can lead to meaningful and lasting success.

3. Remind yourself of your strengths. Take a moment to think about past achievements or successes. What are some accomplishments that you're proud of? How did your strengths contribute to these achievements? Make a list of your positive qualities, skills, and talents. Consider both personal and professional strengths. What are you good at? What do others often compliment you for? One of the most prowerful practices is to think about challenges or obstacles you've overcome in the past. How did you use your strengths to navigate these situations? What qualities helped you persevere?

4. See yourself as a super hero. Envisioning yourself as a superhero can be a fun and empowering exercise. Identify your strengths, talents, and qualities that make you unique. These are your "superpowers." Consider what you're naturally good at and what sets you apart. You can then develop an alter ego that embodies your superhero persona. Choose a name, symbol, and costume that resonate with your qualities and values. This can be a pwerful reminder of your incredible capabilities and encourage you to use them to achieve your goals and make a positive difference in your life and the lives of others.

Final Thoughts

Remember throughout our lifetime it’s completely natural for our confidence levels to rise and fall, as we learn new things, become competent and gain enriching experiences our confidence grows as a result. The challenge is often regaining confidence after being hit by a challenge or life change. By practicing the 4 C’s of connection, compassion, curiosity and courage you will strengthen yrou ability to build and rebuild unstoppable inner confidence again and again.

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Resources

Here are some useful resources to check out if you’d love to dive deeper into some of these concepts.

Dr Kristen Neff - Associate Professor in Educational Psychology, Author and CoCreator of the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion
https://self-compassion.org/

Dr Brené Brown - Professor, Researcher, Author, Podcaster and inspirational Speaker. Her work on shame, vulnerability, and leadership are groundbreaking. https://brenebrown.com/

Todd Herman - Author, Speaker, and Coach focused on mental toughness, leadership, and peak performance
https://alteregoeffect.com/